After attending Joy’s workshop I realized that I haven’t quite spent the time to re-discover who I am and live that truth since becoming a mom 5 years ago. My life went from unabashedly living my truth in my early twenties to becoming insecure and, dare I say, “mousy” after motherhood. I decided to make a Pinterest board of my “brand story”-what makes me come alive and what I want to show the world. It turned into this beautiful project of soul searching, if this post is too melodramatic it’s because I was listening to Explosions in the Sky on Pandora the whole time I was writing and pinning- I may come back and edit this with more lightheartedness tomorrow, but for now, I’m feeling it! Cue the music.

I began pinning things like “free spirit”, “laughter”, “nature”, “childlike” and found that I am neither living or “showing” what I love in my life. Part of it is raising three, young kids and paying a mortgage, but the other part was just not knowing or remembering what I’ve always loved. I had lost sight of the wonder and the lightheartedness that I once had. Doing this project really inspired me to go after the things that I love again and to live life to the fullest. Joy encouraged us to put thought into who we were as artists apart from our roles in the family, here is what I wrote when trying to find who I am in the deeper “onion” layers of my soul other than just a mom and wife identity.

I am free spirited and childlike. I’ve been lost and found several times over. I’ve never given up on the fight of faith, truth and love. I swing between playful and light and deep and complex. I prefer to be outdoors running and playing in the sunshine among the birds and the flowers and observing the natural world with wonder. I enjoy stories and love the “real” in every new person that I meet- What is their story? Who are they beyond their outward appearance? What is their destiny? What wisdom is hidden in their lives?

I am driven and compassionate.

I can take charge or be very laid back.

I have a love for the weird and wonderful and find a strange delight in opposing the norm.

I want to do something that matters. I want to preserve the beautiful things that we overlook, save the lost, give hope to the hopeless, be a light.

I am completely invested in my passions, and when they change I move swiftly towards my newfound purpose.

I am a believer in God and His love for all mankind.

I’ve been rich and I’ve been poor and have learned the secret beauty of contentment regardless of my circumstance.

Compassion and depth tethered to fiery passion and hope are my flags.

I found these photos on my Facebook feed from pre-motherhood and now. Since then, I have grown deeper and have learned to give myself more grace, my insecurities that I had no idea that I was hiding behind have started to uncover and I’m looking expectantly to change them into strength. I am happy to see how I grow from here!